The Art of Choosing Yourself
Before I get started, let me just say that I am not an expert. I do not have a PhD and I am not a registered counselor. I am just a girl who has lost points of her life because her mental health was a demon and not her sanctuary.
Over the past couple of years, I went through a change. I realized that my personality was being shut down because I was letting anxiety and depression take over. In relationships, I thought it was healthy that I was losing myself for the benefit of the other person (basically, I just did whatever it was to make them happy and not myself).
So, why am I bringing all of this up now? Well, this week was the #BellLetsTalk campaign. It was created as a way to start open communication from those who live with anxiety, depression, bipolar disorder, etc. While I do not agree with giving giant corporations money for something that should be free (ending the stigma of talking about your mental health unlike the way we talk about our physical health), I feel as though I should share to you what I have been doing to improve my mental well-being. IF you find any of what I say useful then this post has not gone to waste.
I am a big believer in bettering yourself. Once you start to grow as a person, you instantly start to feel better. I recommend picking up the book “The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck” by Mark Manson. If, you are like me, and swearing can be part of your vocabulary then this book is for you. It drops the formal of a self help book and adds personality but explaining that you only have so many f*cks to give in your lifetime…should you be using one now?
That book was given to me during a time where I didn’t know I needed it, isn’t that just the best?
According to MHA (Mental Health America), you should change up your diet, exercise and practice good hygiene. For example: eating healthier, laying off the beers, going out for daily walks and showering regularly.
I agree with those 3 statements however, I feel as though you shouldn’t beat yourself up because you had a bad day and skipped the teeth brushing or bought yourself a 6 pack of Canadians rather than sticking to herbal tea and water. It’s okay to have a bad day.
My final point, and I believe this is the biggest one, start giving yourself mantras. Once you change your outlook on a situation, the easier it will be to accept it and move on. Everyday I say to myself: “it will be okay”. Relationship ended? It will be okay. Lost your job? It will be okay. No matter what, you will get through it because you are enough despite what a lack of chemicals in your brain tell you. You are enough.
The simple art of choosing yourself is not easy. You may have to break some hearts, including your own but, you are doing it for the better good. Start with yourself. Go talk to a registered counsellor, seek out a psychiatrist if it is medications that you are needing or just relax and read a book. Sometimes in life, you need to be selfish and be the most important person to yourself and that is okay.
